My Own Odyssey

Holy Toasted Marshmallows! The last couple of weeks have been intense for me. Remember a few posts back, when I alluded to my intuition alerting me that something big was coming my way? That no area of my life would be unaffected?
Turns out I was spot on.
I am not, for once, going to go into detail here. Yes, even for me, there are things too private to share with the world.
However, I can't ever seem to  turn off extrovert mode, because that is my default...and  I want to say this about my Amazing Revelation:
Finally, after all of the soul searching and internal work I have dedicated myself to over the last 5 years, FINALLY, I have made contact with the piece that has been my road block to all other things- my career, money habits, ambition, relationships, body image, creativity...the list seems to go on because this obstacle has leached its way into so many areas of my life with fear and stagnation.

“If I had an hour to save the world I would spend 59 minutes defining the problem and one minute finding solutions” ~Albert Einstein

A major sense of accomplishment has been resonating through me, in the days since the Amazing Revelation. Identifying the issue has brought so much clarity, and while the road ahead of me won't be easy, it certainly will not do me in. If anything, I feel more certain of my path and the steps I know I will be making. 

Lately, I have been wanting to compartmentalize my life, so that I could have the space within in it to process all that has surfaced. And while for once I am feeling more introverted and introspective,- there is also a sense of openness and freedom like I have never known. Those two things feed my soul- how did I allow myself to be so repressed for so long? I simply did not know....we are masters of illusion.

In the end, I have reaffirmed what I have known all along- we are each doing the very best we can in every minute.
None of us are perfect. 
None of us have it completely figured out. 
Those gaps  in clarity where the unknown resides- well- those are the places that are filled with possibilities as much as they are filled with fear. The real action takes place when we choose the possibilities that lift is up out of the fear. 

So, Universe,  I say Yes to to following:

Yes, I will work to heal the fearful parts of my heart and soul that have been left in the dark for far too long. I am looking forward to it, because I know THIS is what I need to do to get to the good stuff waiting for me. I am super elated to be arriving here at last, and am not  the least turned off by a little hard work. It won't take me forever, especially since I am willing to do whatever needs doing to reach my intended destination.

 Yes, I will walk bravely and excitedly into a new direction with my career. I am trusting that you will deliver the people, places and experiences I need to keep stepping towards my True North. Gently, is the way I'd like this to unfold. No sudden moves- I'd prefer to ease into it. Its time to do what I am meant to to do, with the intention of helping others, and myself. 

Yes, I will open myself up to a solid, healthy, fun, mature, adventurous, loving, sensuous, surprising relationship with a NICE guy. I know what I deserve; I know what I want, and I will not settle for less than that. Its time, and I am ready for it so give him the green light to come on in. Please remind him that my nervousness is temporary- I'm a little rusty.

This is my Odyssey, and there isn't anything odd about it, because when you find your way back home, you realize you never actually left in the first place. 
Heart is where the home is.